Halloween arrived on Wisteria Lane and sadly the real horror was not Lee dressed as Marilyn Monroe. Instead the kids of Fairview were menaced by a post-menopausal Renee and the after effects of her “Women’s Love Juice”. Amusing as the whole situation was it did provide us with some sorely needed character development for Renee who while recovering in the hospital revealed that she hasn’t had sex since her divorce. It seems Renee talks a big game but deep down she’s just another insecure romantic. I’m rooting for her and Ben, but I won’t be surprised if we find out Ben is not what he seems to be.

Susan’s (Teri Hatcher) quest to become a serious artist took a leap forward this week when her teacher Andre Zeller chose her to be an intern on his latest project. Then it took two leaps backwards when internship turned out to be a fancy word for babysitter. The big news here is that Andre has a son who is just as miserable and intolerable as his father and Susan makes cheering the boy up her mission in life. The mission turns out to be pretty easy. Getting Andre to acknowledge he has a son that needs attention took a little more work and Susan did a fine job of it. For once she wasn’t falling over herself or getting naked for dubious reasons. I liked that she told Zeller she was done trying to get him to like her because she doesn’t like him. Go Susan!

At the Scavo’s house Lynette (Felicity Huffman) is finding it hard to manage with Tom’s new girlfriend Jane hanging around and when she offers to make Penny a Halloween costume Lynette swoops in. But we know Lynette can’t even thread a needle much less manage The Black Swan so with some help from Renee she hires an ex-Broadway costume designer to make it. What she gets back is a castoff from the set of Burlesque and Tom isn’t too thrilled about it. His gal comes to the rescue because in addtion to being a doctor she also knits costumes for all the kids in the cancer ward. Lynette tries to mark her territory with Tom (Doug Savant) and Jane calls her out for always wanting a fight which is why they are not togehter in the first place. I think that is what we call “getting told” Lynette. Snap. Kitten with a whip indeed. Penny did look cute though.

Now on a more serious note, I am not enjoying drunk Carlos at all. I don’t have any issues with them heading down this particular road but drunk Carlos doesn’t do anything but hallucinate and drink quietly by himself in a corner. I want drunk Carlos dancing on a table in his underwear while singing the National Anthem at little Juanita’s birthday party. I want some Postcards from the Edge stuff going on up in here. Maybe it’s a slow build and Carlos will crash spectacularly in time for Christmas. Everyone loves eggnog right?

Speaking of alcoholics Bree (Marcia Cross) is doing pretty well staying on the wagon in light of recent developments. She has kept a cool head concerning the news that Ben’s real estate development is about to break ground and uncover their little secret. And this wouldn’t be a week in Fairview if the girls didn’t embark on a woefully unrealistic attempt to manipulate the situation in their favor. This particular one involved trapping rare frogs to plant on the site and only Gabby (Eva Longoria) would wear a mini-dress and waders to go trolling for exotic amphibians. One would think that after this many years of friendship Bree would know better than to ask Gabby to help handle anything slimy. When they finally do get out to the woods with their shovels they find out he’s already dug up which they sort of gave away in the first few seconds of the episode. And who was the man chasing them through the woods?